We can live beside the ocean, leave the fire behind. Swim out past the breakers, watch the world die. –Everclear
Many years ago, my wife and I lived on the beach in Santa Monica, a stone’s throw from Big Dean’s “Muscle-In” Cafe and the Santa Monica Pier. At the time, I was pursuing my dream of becoming a Hollywood screenwriter, and rolling with the punches of the rollercoaster lifestyle.
Along with my career dreams, I had dreams of the finer things on the West Coast. And that included living in one particular, beautiful beach house right on The Strand overlooking the ocean. Ahhhh.
Just about every day, I would jog past this house, smile and picture our family growing up in this mini-paradise. This image gave me hope during the bumpy journey along the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. It provided the resilience necessary to keep going despite the uphill climb.
On a recent trip out to the West Coast, I ventured out for an early morning jog along the beach and past the very same house that inspired me some 20 years earlier. I thought the reunion would generate a visceral reaction. Perhaps a reminder of a shattered dream. A life fallen short. A road not taken. And, as I slowly cruised past the house, I took a deep breath and soaked in the fresh, salt air. And I felt….calm. Peaceful. With no mixed emotions.
Why? By my 1999 standards, I had failed on every level. I was not a world-famous screenwriter. I had never been featured in Variety. I did not live in a beautiful beach house overlooking the Pacific Ocean!
But those dreams had changed. I had new dreams for my family on the East Coast. Dreams for my children, who only existed in my mind back then. Dreams of becoming an author, a songwriter, and a blogger! And long-term dreams of becoming a grandfather (not any time soon!) a patriarch, and a caretaker. The truth is, while those Santa Monica dreams were so important to me at the time, I now barely recognized them. They did not die. They merely morphed into new and even more powerful dreams! And the same is true for all of our dreams as we climb the winding staircase of life.
Dreams Drive Us Forward
No matter where we are in our careers, we need to have goals and dreams. Perhaps we dream of a certain title or position within the company. Perhaps we dream of landing a particular client or achieving a certain victory. Perhaps we dream of working for a certain company or winning a certain award. These dreams fuel us and motivate us to new heights.
And these same dreams spill over into our personal lives. Perhaps we dream of dating a certain person. Perhaps we dream of reaching a certain level of security. Perhaps we dream of visiting a certain island or part of the world. Perhaps we dream of finding the right partner and having children (or a dog!). Or perhaps we just dream of finding peace. These dreams require work to come true. And they sustain us in difficult times.
New Dreams Sprout From Failure
Whatever the dream, we have to fight with everything we have in the moment. We need to “leave it all on the field”, as we may never get another shot. Carpe Diem! But what if we fall short? We can’t just shrug our shoulders and dismiss with an “oh well, I tried” wave of the hand. When we hold something sacred, it is crushing to fail. We will want to crawl into a hole and hide from the world. And that is okay. Devastation is a natural by-product of passion.
But that passion expended in pursuit of a fallen dream provides the fertilizer for new dreams to grow. And the harder that dream crashes, the greater the new dream becomes. The effort of pursuing a dream is like a muscle. And it provides the foundation to summon the grit and work ethic to drive us toward new dreams.
Let’s Climb Another Mountain
Dreams will come and go in our lives. Some will define us. Some will come and go without warranting a mention. But the ones we tirelessly pursue will always be a part of us. If we succeed, we will know the incredible feeling and thrill reaching the top of the mountain. But even if we fail, we have not wasted our energy. The effort put into pursuing the failed dream will help propel us to the top of a different mountain. A mountain we may never have imagined at the time!
Are you ready to climb another mountain? The Santa Monica dream has changed. But it will never die.
One of your best.
Great one, Rob! A pivot can be your best move. Time offers the best perspective.
Thank you for the shot in the arm this morning. Really needed it!
Yet it was such a great house in a fine location with great 👍 views….
Rob, thanks, this is very relevant to all of us, both personally and professionally. My own journey has been more than a little curvy, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.