Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened! — Dr. Seuss

Eleven years ago, my friends (and next-door neighbors), Mark and Karen Quinn, built what I considered to be the world’s greatest treehouse.  It was approximately 15 feet off the ground and could easily fit 4 or 5 children at a time.  There was a slide pole to come down, a sturdy wooden ladder to go up, and a dangling rope swing for the extra adventurous.

Their children (and my children) had years of fun exploring and conquering new worlds from the vista of their treetop kingdom.  Even mundane activities such as reading or decorating took on a heightened thrill when performed in the beautiful patch of real estate they called their own.

But alas, nothing gold can stay!  The kids are more or less grown up now and the frequency of use and intensity of excitement has waned in proportion with their advancing ages.  In addition, eleven years of wind, rain, and insects had taken a debilitating toll on the sturdiness of the structure.

In a normal environment,  the inevitable might take a little longer.  But in a Covid environment, projects take on a little more urgency.  Sadly, the moment of truth finally arrived for the glorious treehouse!  Plank by plank, the old treehouse came down.  Within hours, the entire structure sprawled across the lawn like a post-hurricane casualty.

Change always brings an appropriate amount of nostalgia.  The treehouse was not just a physical structure of wood and nails, it represented a moment in time.  Innocence.  Excitement. Simplicity.  Good old-fashioned fun.  And its demise unleashed a tacit admission that we can’t hold back the hands of time.  But the dismantling also brought about a clean slate, ushering in a new phase of life, with endless possibilities for different adventures and accomplishments.

This juxtaposition of nostalgia, sadness, and excitement makes these moments so unique.  We yearn for the past while looking forward with hope.   Something lost. Something gained.  The closing of one chapter and the beginning of another.

Change Requires Action

And this phenomenon goes far beyond the treehouse.  This push and pull happens every time we shift into a new phase of life.  Leaving the ancestral home and moving off to college.  Converting the old bedroom full of trophies and posters into a new office.  Accepting a promotion with far more responsibility.  Changing careers later in life.  It is never easy to transition away from comfort into the great unknown.  We all get nostalgic for the Linus blanket.  But think about the alternative?

Would you rather stay in the same job and let your skills slowly wither?  Would you rather be haunted by the possibilities of the path not taken?  Would you rather be a 35-year old living with your parents and surrounded by Lebron posters?  Would you rather just passively watch the treehouse crumble?  Transition and change require action.  Even when we are comfortable, we have to accept that change is inevitable.  And it is up to us to make that change happen!

These Are the Good Old Days

I’m not saying we have to be happy about these transitions.  There are moments we desperately want to freeze in time.  The smiles in the old treehouse (along with the zipline and trampoline!)  The warmth of a relationship before it turned sour.  A picture that makes you say out loud “Wow, wasn’t it great when the kids actually wanted to be with us!”  But that’s not how it works.  We know time won’t stand still.  So we have to stay present and appreciative while the “good old days” are happening!  And always prepare to move on to the next chapter with confidence.

When we move on from a positive phase in our lives, we have to be thankful it occurred. Not everyone experiences this type of joy and emotion.  And these moments should not be taken for granted.  Even if it doesn’t last forever, we will always have those glorious memories. No one can take them away from us.  In this way, nostalgia shifts from a sad emotion tinged with regret into a powerful force of strength for the future!

Life is all about phases.  So when we finally tear down the treehouses in our lives, don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened!