Clink! Clink! Clink! Clink! Clink!

The beer bottles tapped away in a harmonious melody as they made their journey down the conveyor belt in the Straub Brewery.  That is the sound my mom, Phyllis Straub Clark, woke up to every morning growing up in St. Mary’s, Pennsylvania.

“It was the most relaxing sound in the world.”

The Straub Family owned the largest brewery in this tiny, idyllic town in Western Pennsylvania.  They formed a tight-knit bond and family members were encouraged to buy houses surrounding the brewery.  Phyllis  grew up as an only child in a loving home directly across the street.

“My aunts, uncles and cousins all lived within walking distance to the brewery.  There was such a great sense of community.”  

And Phyllis would need the full support of that family and community from an early age.

Gone to the Angels

One of Phyllis’ first memories was her father yelling for her from the bedroom.  He implored Phyllis, only five years old at the time,  to get her mother. Even at that young age, she knew that something was terribly wrong.  Her Aunt Annie immediately raced over in her Packard Sedan and drove Phyllis to the home of her Aunt Betty and Aunt Agnes.  On the way, Phyllis asked what happened to her dad.  Aunt Annie’s somber reply is still emblazoned in her memory.

“Your daddy has gone to the angels.”

Gerard Straub was a gregarious, larger-than-life, red-headed lawyer who was being groomed to become the District Attorney.  But he hadn’t saved much money along the way.  His sudden passing from a massive heart attack left Phyllis and her mother in a difficult financial spot.

“Money was always an issue from that point.  Thank goodness we were surrounded by family.”

Phyllis’ mom went back to work at The Stackpole Carbon Company, one of three carbon conglomerates in the beer and coal town.  With her mom suffering emotionally and working hard, Phyllis needed her extended family more than ever.

“My Uncle Pete’s family had ten kids.  And I suddenly became their 11th.  There was always a spot at the dinner table for me.  I will never forget it.”

And so a tragedy became more sanguine.  There were large family gatherings.  There were the unforgettable summer trips down to Bear Run, the Straub Family campsite, with Fourth of July Parades, hay rides and other good old-fashioned American family fun.  So instead of being an only child, Phyllis now had a whole host of cousins she now considered brothers and sisters.

Eventually, the financial picture stabilized and she and her mother were able to hold on to the house across from the Straub Brewery.  And while it was never the same, Phyllis still shared great memories with her mom and her extended family.

“Christmas Time was the best.  We would make the rounds to every family home.  It was one big open house.  And as we got older, Aunt Reggie would always serve alcohol.  That was my favorite.”

The things we remember!   

But Phyllis Straub Clark would not stay in St. Mary’s forever. Always intellectually curious and brilliant, she was the valedictorian of her  high school.  Her mother wanted her to go to college and Phyllis was keenly interested in medicine.  They found the perfect place for her in all-girls Trinity College in Washington, DC.

It was off to the big city for Phyllis!

Starting  a Life in Washington, DC

Phyllis absolutely loved her experience at Trinity. She majored in biology and excelled in the classroom.  In another day and age, she might have been a doctor.

“It wasn’t politically correct for women to become doctors back then.  And I didn’t want to fight the establishment.  That wasn’t my nature.”

She graduated from Trinity and became the most qualified medical technician in the area.  She was fortunate to work at Georgetown University for Dr. George Schreiner, who was one of the early pioneers of the artificial kidney.  It was gratifying and important work.  But she also found time to have some fun.

The Catholic College Alumni Club was the foundation of the social scene for many college-educated Catholics in Washington, DC in the 1950s.  They had bridge groups, picnics, dances and other mixers.

“Many of our best friends came from this group.  Over 20 of them met as singles in this club and left as married couples.  That was the foundation of our social life for the rest of our lives.”

Most of her friends were married.  But Phyllis was still single when she met Reed Clark at one of the picnics.  Reed was running for office in the club (Shocker!).  The first time they met, Reed asked Phyllis if she would vote him.

“He got my vote.”

They started dating almost immediately and a few years later, Reed asked Phyllis to marry him.  After a few more asks (resilience!), Reed got her vote once again!

Phyllis and Reed were married on September 17, 1960 in St. Mary’s, Pennsylvania.  Along with her mom, all the aunts, uncles and cousins from the Straub Family were on hand to celebrate the big event.

After tying the knot, they piled into their Ford Falcon and drove back to Washington, DC to start their new life together!

The Miracle of Motherhood

Phyllis and Reed were both only children who had married later in life.  They both wanted children of their own but did not think it was going to be possible.

“I was from a big extended family and wanted that same feeling of community.  We decided we were going to adopt.”

Through a connection from her mom, Phyllis reached out to Father Baker’s Orphanage in Buffalo, New York.  As the adoption process was underway, a funny thing happened.

“I got pregnant!” 

Phyllis had to quit her job at the National Institute of Health.  And my brother Bill was born a few months later.

“You don’t know what love is until you hold your baby.  It was a miracle!”

Motherhood agreed with Phyllis.  She thought they would have one child, just as she and Reed had grown up.  But then another funny thing happened.

“Six months after Bill was born, my mom looked at me and told me I was pregnant again.  I thought she was crazy.  But mothers are always right!”

My brother Jerry was born six months later.  Then a couple years later my sister Jeanne was born.  The miracles kept on coming!

They thought that was it for children.  But there were more miracles on the horizon.

“I’m so thankful the rhythm method failed after that.  We would have never had your brother Steve or you!”

(C’mon, ma.  Now THAT is the ultimate TMI!  Shudder.)

And there you have it.  Five children in eight years.  A miracle indeed!

Motherhood is Forever

Phyllis and Reed now had the large family they always wanted but never thought possible.  But it didn’t come without sacrifice.  There were bills to pay.  They had to move out of their 3-bedroom house.  Phyllis eventually went back to work full-time as a medical technician in the Department of State.

“We didn’t have a lot of money, but it was always enough.  The Good Lord provided.”

The focus was on her children. And Reed and Phyllis would do whatever it took to make ends meet.

“Motherhood was the greatest thing ever to happen to me.  I didn’t take it lightly.  We had to take of our children.  That was our number one priority.”

You certainly did, mom.  And then some!

There were a lot of ups and downs.  Life was not a linear climb to the top.  But Phyllis and Reed had their priorities straight, and that made the journey a lot smoother.  And that journey is never over.

“Motherhood never ends.  You never stop caring.  You never stop feeling responsible for your children. If something hurts one of my children, it hurts me.  That never goes away.”

Thanks for always having our back, mom! 

Children get older.  Not even moms can change that.  So what advice does Phyllis have for parents who are sending their children off to college?

“It’s all part of the natural cycle.  You want the best for them. You want them to be happy.  Besides, they will still come home a lot.  They might even come back to live for a while.”

Yes, motherhood never ends.  And neither does being a son or daughter.  

In addition to being a mother of five, she is the proud grandmother of seventeen!

“Being a grandmother has all the joys of being a parent but without as much of the responsibility.  And it gives you more people to love.  What a blessing!”

Phyllis Clark has given everything to her children.  And to her grandchildren.  She has worked hard and never lost sight of the priorities of taking care of her family.  She considers motherhood the greatest miracle that has ever happened in her life.  That may be true.  But her four sons and one daughter and seventeen grandchildren want her to know one thing.

She is the greatest miracle to happen in our lives!

And isn’t that true of all moms?  Thank God for mothers. Living or “gone to the angels”, they will never stop caring for us.  They will always have our back.  They will always help us stay resilient.

We can’t get through this life on our own.  We need someone in our corner.  Let’s hear it for all the mothers out there who make this world a better place.  Today.  And always.

Motherhood never ends.