Leap, and the net will appear. –John Burroughs
The US Marshals Survivor’s Benefit Fund assists the surviving family members of active US Marshals who are killed in the line of duty. Every year, they host a golf tournament to support this incredibly worthy cause. And this year, we put together a great foursome, and welcomed the tournament back into action!
As is customary with most fundraisers, there were all sorts of extra packages available for purchase to help improve our team’s overall score. Since we really believed in the mission, and needed all the help we could get, we bought ‘em all! Of course, there were the “mulligans”, a chance to take another swing after a bad shot, which is a tradition at most tournaments. But this year, the Survivor’s Benefit Fund also offered a unique “Good Enough for Government Work” string. Essentially, any time one of our shots landed within three feet of the pin (the length of the string), the group could automatically claim the putt as “good” and move on. We had four of these magical strings. Bonus!
As most golfers know, putting is a huge part of competing in these types of tournaments. And with the bonus string, we had a huge safety net in place in case the putts were not falling. On the first hole, we (not me!) put our approach shot about three feet from the cup. We could have used the string as a “gimmee” but decided to putt it out so we could save it for later in the round. But after four failed bites at the apple, we needed to burn one of our strings. No matter, we had three more. Birdie time!
But unfortunately, the second hole was a repeat. Our foursome had a bad case of the yips. By the eighth hole, we were out of “strings” and “mulligans”. No more gimmicks. We had to post our best shot and live with the consequences. And then a funny thing happened. Our concentration level escalated. Our competitive streak intensified. We started rolling in putts from all over the green. We started believing in each other and playing way above our potential. As soon as our safety net disappeared, we flourished as individuals and as a team.
And that is a good thing to remember in our personal and professional lives.
Remove the Safety Net
There are so many well-meaning people supporting us. And so many luxuries we can take advantage of in our professional lives. The protective boss who will always step in and fix a problem for us. The forgiving customer who looks past our repeated product failures. The surplus cash of cash from optimistic investors. Security is a good thing. And we can all use a buffer in our professional lives. But could those same positives be holding us back?
Imagine if we had to solve our own problems. Imagine if we had to be accountable for our shortcomings. Imagine if we didn’t have all the cash in the world. Wouldn’t our concentration level intensify? Wouldn’t we have to sharpen our skills and learn to overcome adversity? Wouldn’t we be more judicious with our decisions? We don’t always have mulligans and three-foot strings to offer a do-over opportunity. And that is okay. Because sometimes a safety net leads to complacency. Sometimes a string gives us a false sense of security. Sometimes, we learn an awful lot about ourselves when the outcomes are unknown and the consequences are severe.
Take Off the Bubble Wrap
And the same is true in our personal lives. We want to shelter our children from harm. We want to provide security for our family. We want to get along with our significant other. These are all positive scenarios and worthy goals. But sometimes, it is okay for our children to fail. Sometimes it is okay to take a calculated risk. Sometimes it is okay to speak our minds even when it may hurt feelings.
We can’t always live in a bubble-wrapped world. Sometimes, removing the kid gloves brings out the best in our loved ones. Sometimes stepping outside our comfort zone provides a breath of fresh air for everyone involved. Sometimes, we have to speak the raw truth in order to grow closer with the people we cherish most.
Learn to Bounce
But what happens when we are out of string and we still miss all our putts? What happens when we are exposed and fail? Removing the safety net didn’t work out so well for The Flying Wallendas! That is okay. At least we have the courage to dare and the feeling of exhilaration that comes with placing everything on the line. And while the fall is gut-wrenching, these failures and mistakes are rarely fatal. We learn from them. We lick our wounds and live for another day. We bounce.
Life begins when we remove the safety net. Resilience is born when failure is actually an option. It’s time to start draining those putts with no strings attached!