My friend Jeff Howard introduced me to an interesting book by V.B. Tenery titled Against the Odds.  The book is a fictional account of the events surrounding the September 11, 2012 attacks on the American Consulate and CIA Annex in Benghazi, Libya.

Over the course of twenty hours, the entire city was cast into chaos and lawlessness stemming from the dual attacks.  When the consul was attacked at night, most people assumed the onslaught was over.  But six hours later a separate assault was launched in the early hours of September 12th.  In between the two incidents, one staff member was lamenting how bad it was inside the consul. A senior ranking official soberly assessed the situation.

“Never assume things can’t get worse.”

In this case, the official was correct.  Things did get worse.  And while that advice applied to Benghazi, it is also relevant in our own work and personal lives.

When we are faced with difficult moments, it is natural to focus on all the things that have gone wrong.  It is natural to assume things can’t get any worse.  But during these times, we need to change our focus and perspective. Even in challenging times, we have to understand that there is still a lot going right.  We need to subtly shift our mindset from despair to appreciation.

If We Look Closely Enough, We Can Always Find Hope

In our work lives, bad news can come like an avalanche.  A lost sale at the end of the year.  A new competitor that threatens the viability of our business.  A new boss who questions our value to the organization.  A failing team with a lack of motivation.  During these times, it can feel like rock bottom.  We turn inward and sulk about our challenging situation. How could things get any worse?

But even rock bottom has a trapdoor.  In our darkest times, we need to take stock of all the things we do have going for us.  What other deals are in the pipeline to help us close the gap?  What unique advantages does our business have to gain share in another market?  Who else in the organization appreciates our contributions?  What remaining motivation can we leverage for the future?  Failure and hopelessness in one area of our business does not mean that all is lost.  If we look closely enough, we can find some hope to build on.  And if we still have something to lose, it means that things can always get worse.  At the very least, we have to keep fighting for all the good things still in play.

People Are Counting On Us to Deliver

And this is even more critical in our personal lives.  There are times when the situation feels desperate.  If seems as if things will never get better.  We face massive financial pressure.  We experience a fractured personal relationship.  We endure family strife and discord.  Our teenagers make questionable decisions.  Sometimes they all hit at once!  How could things get any worse?  It can only improve from here.

Not necessarily.  And that is good news.  Even in the most difficult times, we still have a lot more to lose.  So we need to step back and appreciate all the good that is mixed in with the bad.    We may be in dire financial straits but we have a solid foundation of support in our personal network.  We may be weathering a rocky relationship but there is still some common ground.  We may be suffering a family squabble but it is still family.  We can work it out.  Our children may not always make perfect decisions but they still need us to show them the way.  We can never throw in the towel on our personal lives.  We have too many people counting on us to make things better.

Things Will Get Better

Resiliency is all about perspective and appreciation.  In difficult times, we have to resist the temptation to focus on the negative.  We have to resist the urge to feel like a victim.  We can’t sit back and go into a shell.  It’s time for action!

Struggles don’t just go away.  We have to work at it.  Resilient people acutely feel the pain and heartache and disappointment.  But they also have perspective in the moment.  They appreciate the people who provide stability in times of chaos.   They understand that no matter how bad things seem, there is always room for hope.  Things could always be worse!

Once we realize we have more to lose, our perspective changes.  We have the strength to fight and defend what we have instead of mourning what we have lost.  We should never assume that things can’t get worse.  But if we stay positive and keep moving forward, we know that things will only get better.