The Georgetown Prep-Landon lacrosse rivalry is one of the biggest in the nation.  Each year, the game features massive crowds, frenzied media attention and local bragging rights.  It is a game the kids circle on the calendar during the off-season.

Through a confluence of circumstances, my son, a Georgetown Prep goalkeeper and one of the captains of the team, did not have an opportunity to play his senior year against Landon.  As the game wore on,  I grew more distressed about his situation.

 How would he handle the disappointment?  What was going through his mind?  Would he be okay?

I was feeling anxious for him and, to be brutally honest, a little anxious for me.  We were swimming in uncharted territory.

It was a tight game the entire way but Georgetown Prep ended up emerging victorious in overtime.  The fans erupted, the players hurled their sticks in the air, and mayhem took over the stadium.  The celebration continued for several minutes and, at some point, I lost sight of my son on the field.

As I was stewing in a confusing cauldron of elation and uneasiness, I spotted a fast-moving shadow out of the corner of my eye.  Suddenly, I was lifted up into the air and tackled from behind!  What the [expletive deleted]?

I whirled around to face my attacker.  To my incredible shock and joy, it was my own son. He had a smile as wide as the sky and pumped his fists in the air.

“We did it!  It wasn’t the way I dreamed it up, but we [expletive deleted] beat Landon!” 

He was euphoric.  It was a huge team win.  And, despite his situation, he recognized the importance of competing for something bigger than one person.  And the power of taking  joy in the success of others.

Couldn’t we all benefit from that perspective in our personal and professional lives?

It’s Not Always About Our Own Success

In our work lives, we have individual and team goals.  It is challenging when the team is crushing the number but our own goals lag behind.  Can we muster the strength and character to send out a congratulatory note to a colleague?  Can we show excitement for the collective success of the team?  Can we celebrate the promotion or recognition of a worthy teammate?  Of course we are disappointed if our performance is not up to our standards.  Of course we want and expect more from ourselves.   But it shouldn’t come at the expense of others.  Jealousy and resentment can have an insidious impact on any team dynamic.  And, worse, it can severely stunt our own growth and development.

The same is true in our personal lives.  Can we celebrate when a friend achieves financial success?  Can we derive satisfaction from a family member’s accomplishments?  Can we recognize the greatness in the ones we love, even if our shortcomings hold us back?  It is natural to feel some pang of heartache when our own situation seems perilous.  We are only human.  But we have to muster the strength to celebrate the success of others.  We have to resist the gravitational pull of bitterness and envy.  We are playing for something that is bigger than one person.

Resilience is Born in Our Darkest Times

Why is this concept so important?  First, it is the right thing to do.  But beyond that, celebrating the success of others and playing for the team win will fuel our own resiliency.  If we spend our time sulking and rooting against others when our own tide is low, how can we be prepared for success when the tide inevitably rolls back in?

How will we be able to navigate that next big sale?  How will we be able to stop that next big shot?  How will we be able to humbly take our own success to the next level?  The seeds of greatness are sown in our darkest times.  That is where character, grit and resilience are born. And that is where confidence either thrives or withers.  The more we can genuinely celebrate the prosperity of our team, our friends and our family, the more success and satisfaction we can enjoy when our own golden opportunity comes to light.

What Is Our Goal?

Robert Baden-Powell, a General in the British Army and the Founder of the Boy Scout Movement, had a great quote: “Leave the world better than you found it”.  That is our simple goal.  But how do we do it?  A healthy perspective in difficult times.  A genuine appreciation for our teammates, family, and friends.  A belief that to truly accomplish something with real significance, we have to fight for and believe in something bigger than ourselves.

As I watched my son rush off to celebrate with his teammates, an overwhelming feeling of pride washed over me.  He did not give me permission to feel sorry for his lost opportunity.  And just then another sudden realization stopped me in my tracks.  My son was a man now.  And he was a better man than me. 

And I am MORE than okay with that epiphany.  In fact, I [expletive deleted] love it.  That is what life is all about.

Leave the world better than you found it!