Is there anything greater than the Thanksgiving Holiday? Turkey. Sweet potatoes. Pumpkin Pie. Football. Family. Did I mention the pumpkin pie? It is truly a glorious time to relax, take stock of our lives, and give thanks for all the blessings we have been given. And it is the only time (past the age of 21) when you can justify spending 8 straight hours on the couch! Even if you felt the stress of hosting a big crowd, now you can sit back and recognize that you just made incredible memories for the next generation. Who doesn’t love the host and hostess with the mostest?
By now, we have all had an opportunity to reflect and appreciate all that we have in our lives. And isn’t that an incredible feeling? Appreciation is a two-way street. It feels good to give it. And it feels good to get it. (See Blog Post: “Appreciation is a Gift” http://www.resilientworker.net/?p=107). But some of our greatest accomplishments in life often go unnoticed or unappreciated. And that is okay. If we build a successful business, we recognize our accomplishments and celebrate when the business is sold. But it took so many thankless moments of hard work and monotonous tactical execution to get to that level. As parents, we can take a moment of pride when our son or daughter walks across the stage to get his or her diploma. But it took hundreds of strenuous hours helping with homework and coordinating rides to get to that stage. In our marriage, we celebrate anniversaries over our many years together. But it takes a lifetime of self-sacrifice and a lot of water under the bridge to keep those milestones coming. In both our work lives and our personal lives, it is important to give thanks for all that we have achieved over the years. But those moments would never have happened without the countless hours of hard work and sacrifice away from the spotlight. Ironically, those thankless moments are the ones we should appreciate the most!
But in these times of instant gratification and immediate recognition, our thankless moments are even more undervalued. In the media, we are constantly exposed to awards shows, self-promoting athletes, and get-rich-quick sales pitches. (The “Man Candle”? Really?) The hard work and dedication necessary to build a lasting legacy, a lasting relationship, or a lasting business gets lost in the noise of self-promotion. Who needs thankless moments when we can instantly get thousands of “likes” on Facebook or millions of hits on YouTube? Who needs thankless moments when you could be one “Shark Tank” pitch away from fame and fortune? Who needs thankless moments when there have never been so many opportunities to capture the spotlight?
If we are living a resilient life, we are not in it for the recognition. The youth coach drilling in the game plan on a cold, rainy night is not thinking about his year-end gift. The solider standing night guard over his fellow troops is not thinking about moving up in the ranks. The teacher coming in early to help a struggling student is not thinking about earning an extra bonus. The manager fighting for compensation for his team is not thinking about how the outcome will impact his own bottom line. The parents working extra shifts to finance their children’s education are not thinking about receiving any recognition at all. These thankless acts of selflessness come out of a sense of duty, honor, and love. No one is looking for extra reward or praise. When you deeply care about a mission, the results are reward enough. When you deeply care about a person, their success is reward enough. You will sacrifice anything to make it happen.
We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give. –Winston Churchill
These selfless acts of giving provide the building blocks of our character and resilience. They also provide a blueprint for our own success and happiness. Let them guide you through the difficult times. You do not need reward or recognition to lead a fulfilling life. You just need to care about someone or something other than yourself. In this time of Thanksgiving, be thankful for the thankless jobs you have tackled in pursuit of your passion or cause. Your success in those smaller endeavors and your ability to keep giving will be your legacy.
Until next week, keep smiling.