Well, it finally happened. After years of consciously staying above the fray, I finally caved. With so much negative swirl in the media, I have avoided pouring over the editorial sections of major newspapers. Not exactly a breeding ground for hope and optimism!
But this time, they have gone too far. They have attacked and sullied a core principle that gets me out of bed in the morning and drives my every waking thought. This time it’s personal. Resilience is under attack!
Earlier in the week, a good friend of mine sent me a New York Times editorial piece titled Is Resilience Overrated? Hmmm. Thems fightin’ words!
In the article, the author wonders out loud if resilience is a “scam”. The underlying tone is that resilience is a concept pushed down by the elitist establishment to keep the proletariat mindlessly working to the bone. The author further intimates that resilience is “an act of subterfuge for the most powerful” providing an excuse to get “the power structures off the hook”. And finally, the author states that resiliency is nothing more than an “unfair exchange of energy”, as if somehow resilience was a carefully designed plan by those at the top to patronize the everyday worker. The humanity! Where do we even begin?
First, why attack something that is so inherently positive? Does that serve the greater good? And what is next on the agenda? Decrying the “shame” of strong character and honesty. Lamenting the empty promise of a solid work ethic. Denouncing the vagaries of exercise and positive mental health? Not everything is guided by some nefarious master plan. Not everything in our culture needs to be torn down!
Resilience is simple. It is mustering the energy to move forward despite the adverse conditions. It is demonstrating passion, through the transformative powers of perspective and appreciation, after facing adversity. And it is a good thing.
Resilience does not discriminate against race, class, financial position, or social standing. Just as we all experience adversity, we all have the capacity for resilience! We all need it. Resilience makes the individual better, thereby improving his or her corner of the world. Thereby improving the human condition. How can you argue that resilience is anything but a positive force in the universe?
But resilience does lay bare one naked truth. Resilience is about accountability, and that word scares a lot of people. No one can be resilient for you. No one can force you to be resilient, just as no one can force you to work hard, live humbly, or maintain a healthy lifestyle. Oftentimes, adversity is not fair. Rarely do we ask for it. But once experienced, we owe it to ourselves to find a way back. This is our life and regardless of how we got here, we have the power to move forward.
I suppose you can make excuses. I suppose you can choose to feel like a victim and shift blame. But will you be better off? Will denial, blame, and stagnation improve your life? Should we encourage people NOT to be resilient? Hmmm.
While resilience requires personal accountability, we don’t have to do it alone. There is a universality to resilience, deeply rooted in humanity and the community. We have to take the first step. We have to be a willing participant. But we could all use support and encouragement. We need the love and empathy of our inner circle. Resilience is a team sport. And it reveals the best in the human spirit. Who doesn’t want to embrace that?
I understand the author was trying to make a point. We all have something to sell and there is no ill will. But please go tear down another positive quality. And back off resilience.
Resilience is not a scam. It is not an excuse to let the power structures off the hook. It is not totalitarian or subversive in nature. Resilience is pure. Resilience is a virtue. Resilience connects all of us together.
Is resilience overrated? Hmmm. What do you think?
Awesome response to a negative misguided and depressed soul.
Hopefully your response will encourage him to seek a higher level of “living” with a more optimistic approach to any obstacles that he will face!
Thank you Rob!
Rick
Your comments about the NYTimes article is right on target. Unfortunately accountability is something a whole generation or two tries to avoid. Visit a Veterans, or non veterans, recovery hospital rehabilitation group regaining mobility. I recently had to personally recover from major reconstructive surgery on my left leg/ankle to stay mobile and healthy. No eliteness here. You just do it and get better. Relearning to walk on my own is hard to conceive without personal resilience.
The world needs to read this weeks post. We would all be better off if we followed Rob’s wonderfully spelled out thoughts on resilience.