The most difficult roadblocks to overcome are the ones we place in our own path.

Branching out is never easy. As I expand the resilient message from the blog to the book, I have received several offers to speak to various companies about resilience in the workplace amidst the long tail of the pandemic. Always fascinated by resiliency, I am more than receptive to such requests and have developed a 25-minute talk track deemed “The Cure for the Zoom Blues”. Catchy, eh?

Knowing this, a good buddy introduced me to his colleague who was hosting an upcoming Zoom “All-Hands” call. I connected with his colleague and we talked about the details of the meeting, their challenges, their needs, etc. It was a great conversation and he couldn’t have been a nicer guy. Toward the end of the conversation, he asked me a simple question that stopped me in my tracks.

“How much do you charge for your talk?”

Hmmm. I (foolishly) hadn’t considered that.

“It’s what I do. You’re a friend of a friend. No charge.”

But he was having NONE of it.

“I have a budget for exactly this type of service.”

“Seriously, it’s cool. Don’t worry about it.”

“Listen…”

He paused dramatically. Then continued with a little more gravitas in his voice.

“Don’t make it hard for me to pay you money!”

And then it hit me. Why put up an objection when there doesn’t need to be one? Why make it hard for someone who values our service? And why do we all put up similar unnecessary roadblocks in our work and personal lives?

The Universe Wants Us to Succeed

In our work lives, we have people who want us to succeed. Managers who eliminate internal roadblocks. Service personnel who do all the little things to ease our burden. Clients and customers who value our products and wisdom. Sometimes, we don’t listen closely enough.  Sometimes, we don’t want to bother them for advice or help. We don’t want to appear weak or clueless. It can be tempting to power through on our own. But by refusing help, we are actually hurting our own chances of success. Why make it so hard?

Accepting help is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of great strength! None of us can get to the top alone. And the more people we involve in our journey, the higher we can climb! And the higher we climb, the more we can help the people behind us! It’s all about listening.  It’s all about making it easy to accept help and support. And then paying it forward.

The same is true in our personal lives. The universe wants us to be happy. Our inner circle would do anything to see us smile. Loved ones will give us advice. Friends will give us strength and encouragement. Family will provide structure. But sometimes, we don’t want to hear it. Sometimes, we make it hard on ourselves by making it hard on them. Why put up barriers that don’t need to exist?

Keep Those Reservoirs Full

Yes, sometimes we make it hard for people to pay us money. But it doesn’t end there.

Don’t make it hard for me to…

…offer you advice.

…have your best interests at heart.

…be your rock.

…love you.

Too often, we put up barriers out of pride. Or shame. Or stubbornness. But the great irony is that we are shutting out the people who want to help us the most! And that is not the path to resilience!

We can accomplish a lot on our own. Our vibrant attitude and work ethic will get us far in life. But we will all face obstacles along the journey. We will all stumble in the face of adversity. During these times, we need to be conscious of the world around us. We need to understand that we have people in our lives who want to help us fly. The barriers are already there. We don’t need to place any more in our path.

Resilience is a team sport. We need other people to fill up our reservoirs when we are low. We need other people to help us on the journey. Why make life harder than it has to be?