Beach Week. An age-old tradition in the Washington, DC area. A bittersweet and glorious time when newly-minted high school graduates head off for a whirlwind week at the shore.
Back in my day, the tradition remained the same, except underclassmen would also join the seniors in the year-end ritual. So after my sophomore year, a few friends and I ventured down to Ocean City, MD to enjoy some sun, surf, and sand. And some other stuff.
But our idyllic adventure quickly turned into a disaster. On the third day, the landlord of our “cozy” beach cottage decided it was no longer necessary for us to stay there. Ouch. We split up and scattered like cockroaches in different directions. My friend Jimmy Geimer and I headed north for a delicious meal at Roy Rogers to boost our spirits. We loved Roy Rogers!
But things went from bad to worse. I left my wallet on the booth for a split second, and when I returned, all three of my crisp $20 bills were missing! That was all the money I had in the world. We had no ATM cards (and if we did, there was no telling if my “Cirrus” Card would be compatible with the “Plus” network). Jimmy was running low on money as well. And we had three days before our ride home, with no way to get additional funds. We were out of options.
We lucked into some couch and floor space in various houses but still had no money for food. So we got creative. Every day we returned to Roy Rogers. We have relished a Double-R Bar burger! But food cost money and the “Fixins Bar” was free! In the morning, we made delicious tomato and pickle sandwiches slathered with ketchup. In the evenings, we mixed it up threw in some lettuce, onions and mayonnaise. Roy Rogers to the rescue! It didn’t win us any points on our Buckaroo Card, but it got the job done!
We didn’t have options. So we had to figure it out. And in the end, we survived. We had an incredible adventure on a non-existent budget and lived to tell the tale.
Options are great. They bring comfort and security and peace of mind. But sometimes, our options can paralyze us. Sometimes our options can soften our resolve and resilience. Sometimes, it’s not a bad option to be out of options and just dive in and swim.
We Have to Figure it Out
In our work lives, we are constantly presented with issues and obstacles on our path to success. A complicated technical sale. A fluctuating market. A fierce new competitor. A dysfunctional team. It’s tempting to punt these issues to someone else. It might be easier to cave in and walk away from the challenges. But what if we had to figure it out? What if we didn’t have any options?
Relying on someone else, without putting critical thought into first solving the problem, dulls our intellect. Dodging potential opportunities because they are complex or difficult dulls our competitiveness. There are times we need to be laser-focused on our goals and just figure out a path forward. Once we remove the crutches, we can unleash our creativity and resolve. Sometimes, tomato and pickle sandwiches are all we need to succeed!
Taking Ownership is the Key
The same is true in our personal lives. We may face difficult and thorny relationship issues. We may face financial pressure. We may face family strife or challenging decisions. It is easy to walk away and start over. It may feel right to declare bankruptcy or bury our heads in the sand. We may just want to ignore the strife and pretend everything is okay. But what if we didn’t have those options?
What if we had to figure out new ways to make money? What if we had to deal with our interpersonal challenges? It’s amazing how easy difficult situations and conversations become once we take ownership and act.
It’s all About the Effort
But salad bar survival may not always sustain us. There are certain tasks that are too complex. Certain relationship issues that are too divisive. Certain financial situations that are too overwhelming. Sometimes, the tomato and pickle sandwiches still leave us hungry and demoralized. That is okay. There is no shame in walking away from an impossible or dysfunctional situation.
As long as we put in a valiant effort. As long as we at least try to figure it out. It’s not always going to come together. In fact, it might be an epic failure. But, regardless of the results, creative action sharpens our resilience and builds our character.
We always have the option to wave the white flag, shift our problems to others and hide from our issues. But that is not the recipe for a resilient life.
Sometimes, the recipe simply calls for a healthy dose of tomato and pickle sandwiches.
Do not forgot the Burger King at closing strategy of Senior year (1987). While we were not in the same dire straits as Summer of ’85; I recall walking up to the BK drive through at 2 AM with you before they closed each night on 94th street and asking for everything they were going to throw away at close for $5. Ahh binge eating and a cunning strategy.
Indeed! One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Especially late-night. Delicious!