Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. – Viktor Frankl

Anyone else having issues finding toilet paper?

Things got a little grim for The Clark Family last week.  We were down to our last roll of toilet paper and the prospects of finding more were fading fast.  With nowhere else to turn, I thoroughly researched options before heading out early the next morning on my quest.

The first option was our local Target, where “seniors” had the run of the place from 6am to 8am.  I showed up at 7:30am, patiently waited, and then bee-lined to the paper products aisle as soon as the doors opened to the general public.  But the entire aisle was already picked clean.  Hmmm.  Okay, on to the local Giant.  Negative. On to Ize’s, a local bagel shop, where rumors of abundant toilet paper swirled.  No dice.  Then a desperate Hail Mary over to Harris Teeter. Zippy!  I was running out of options.

The prospect of returning home empty-handed was unthinkable.  It was no longer about the toilet paper.  I had assigned such meaning to this journey.  This was about being a good father.  This was about providing for my family.  This was about righting all the previous wrongs in my life.  Was I going a little crazy?  Of course!  Aren’t we all?

Suddenly, I remembered the advice from my neighbor, Karen Quinn.  There was a low-key Safeway a little further up Rockville Pike.  Why not give that a shot?  I parked the car and bounded through the door full of renewed hope and energy.  But a worker greeted me at the front and read my mind.

“I just want to let you know, we ran out of toilet paper early this morning. Sorry. “

Devastation.

“But you can check aisle 9 just in case.”

Everything about my body language changed.  With my shoulders slumped and my head bowed, I trudged down the barren wasteland of Aisle 9.  Tumbleweeds.  Another failure.  Another blown opportunity.  Disappointment and frustration all around.  Perhaps this was my destiny in life?

But as I turned back down the aisle, I spied a blue cloth on the top shelf.  I couldn’t quite see that high, but when I pulled the cloth a giant, fluffy, beautiful package of toilet paper spun down onto the tile floor of the grocery store.  It was manna from heaven.  A true miracle for the ages!

I strutted to the checkout line like a conquering hero.  A huge smile spread across my face. A smile that can only be worn by someone secure that, at least for a moment, all was right with the world.

Was my euphoria logical?  Decidedly not.  But it underscored a universal truth in life, which only magnifies in times of crisis.  We all need to have a purpose in life.  We all need to find meaning in our personal and professional lives.

It’s All About the Goal

Perhaps we are chasing a landmark deal.  Perhaps we are taking a rooting interest in the success of a protege.  Perhaps we are focused on launching a product we believe will change the world.  Perhaps we are doggedly pursuing a client that has been elusive.  Whatever the goal, whatever the dream, we assign meaning and purpose to that pursuit.  And that chase can get us through any rocky times.

But that meaning doesn’t have to be limited to material gain.  Perhaps we simply want our children to grow up to be good people.  Perhaps we are focused on finding deeper spiritual meaning.  Perhaps we assign meaning and self-worth to being a solid friend, a good spouse, or a worthy son or daughter.

It Takes Hard Work

Whatever the goal, whatever the quest, it doesn’t just happen.  It’s not enough to just want to achieve our goals.  It’s not enough to plan.  We have to work for it.  We have to power through difficult moments of doubt and despair.  We have to fail and fall on our faces over and over again.  We will let people down.  And they will let us down.  But we have to keep moving forward even in the darkest times.  We have to stay resilient.  We have to keep searching for miracles and rolls of toilet paper that have no earthly reason to be there.

What is Our Purpose?

In this current health crisis, there is so much fear, uncertainty, and doubt.  But life is also much simpler.  Family walks.   Board games.  Netflix.  Online religious services.  Plenty of time to reflect on what is important in our lives.  Now more than ever, while things are quiet, we need to search for and pursue our meaning and purpose.

What really motivates us?  What are our strengths? Who is most important to us?   What can’t we live without?  It doesn’t have to be complicated.  Sometimes, we find meaning in solving a puzzle.  Sometimes, we find meaning in a late-night conversation.  Sometimes we find meaning in matching two socks together.  Sometimes, we find the meaning of life in an extra pack of toilet paper.

Our human spirit is inherently resilient.  We can endure any circumstances.  We can survive any crisis.  We just have to search for purpose and meaning in the madness.