My dog Parker is a good boy.
He is always the first (and sometimes only) one to greet me when I get home, always loving, and always agreeable. And, in a house full of teenagers, that is a WELCOME departure from the norm. But Parker also comes with some responsibility.
Every morning, he sits at the front door and barks. During the cold winter months, I generally treat this like I treat many of my other problems. Ignore it and it will go away. Never a good strategy. Eventually, he grows insistent, and the die has been cast. Time for that arctic blast into the great outdoors!
During a morning dog walk this week, I was completely focused on myself. I was unusually tired. I was particularly cold. I was (frankly) a little hungover. I didn’t think it was fair to be up at this hour. I blamed Parker.
But a funny thing happened as I watched him pointlessly sniffing the bushes. I started thinking about the walk from Parker’s point of view. What was this experience like for him? The walk was his greatest moment of the day! Squirrels. Other dogs. Countless lawns to roll around on. He brought nothing but joy and friendship into our family. He was always there for us. The least I could do was enjoy this time with him.
And that subtle shift in perspective changed the whole experience. I was no longer a reluctant participant in the process. This was not a chore to be endured. I took pride in making sure he enjoyed the walk. I understood this was all about him. And I, in turn, took so much more joy from making this a positive experience. When he was happy, I was happy.
And couldn’t we all benefit from a similar change in perspective?
Understanding a Different Perspective
In our work lives, it’s not always about us. In sales, we constantly bombard the customer with our company statistics and information. But how often do we consider their needs? What would make life easier for them? As managers, it can be painful to juggle the idosynchries and demands of our team members. But truly understanding what makes them happy and successful will deliver huge results for us and the larger team. As entrepreneurs, we can agonize and deliberate on the features and functionality of our product. But how often to do we truly listen to the marketplace?
If we want to reach a new level of success, we have to understand and appreciate other people’s point of view. It’s not about selling, it’s about solving. It’s not about managing, it’s about enabling. It’s not about what we want, it’s about what the market demands. Once we understand our mission is about something other than ourselves, it will be so much more enjoyable. And, perhaps more importantly, it will be so much more successful for everyone involved.
Dealing With Loved Ones Should Not be a Chore
And the same is true in our personal lives. Think about our struggles with a spouse or significant other. Think about the battles with our children. Think about the tensions with close friends or family members. It is a natural part of any relationship and in many ways, inevitable.
But what if we took a step back? What if we saw the situation from the other person’s point of view? There may be good reasons for the tension. I’m not saying this a panacea. Some arguments are deep-rooted and intractable. But there is no downside to trying to understand the other person’s perspective.
Perhaps our significant other is lashing out because he or she is scared. Perhaps our children need more love even when they push us away. Perhaps our family member has their own issues that we don’t know about. These are the people who have always been loyal to us. These are the people who have brought so much joy into our lives. These are the people we can’t live without. We shouldn’t view dealing with them as a chore. We need to see life from their point of view.
Helping Others Helps Us
Resilience is not something that happens in a vacuum. We don’t just absorb strength and perspective from the atmosphere. We have to play an active role in helping others move forward. We have to play an active role in providing solutions and support. We have to be a source of resilience in our work and personal lives.
And the great irony is, helping other people stay resilient helps us as well. Customers, employees, and loved ones all have needs. And the more pride we take in helping others on their morning walk, the closer we will get to achieving our own goals and dreams.
If you light a lamp for someone, it will brighten your own path. Sometimes, we just need to see life from a dog’s point of view.
So true.
Thanks.
Thanks, Coach. it’s a dog’s life…and that is okay!
My almost 12 year old yellow lab appreciates your post Rob!:) Honestly one of my favorite things of dog ownership is walking her ( Marley) – it makes me slow down and smell the roses – literally. Now I do feel a little different when I am walking Marley at 515am 🙂 but afternoon and evening walks are peaceful moments of serenity for me.
Hope you and your gang are all well!
Thanks, Kathy! YEs, I feel the same way about the afternoon/evening walks. Great time to decompress. But not all walks are created equal!